Be the "Non-Judger"

You know you are going through life as a "Non-judger" when people come to you with their most uncomfortable moment or their less than desirable story. Be the "Non-Judger" and allow people to come to you so that when the table is turned you can go to them and get the same response..a "non-judgment."

Live like no one is judging you

Would you live your life differently if you never had to think about what others may think or how your actions might affect the other people around you? Would you paint your front door with pink and purple polka dots or wear tank tops in the snow? There comes a point in each persons life that the decision to make yourself happy before anyone else, has to be made. You can't always worry about how your actions will be received or let the opinions of others impact you, your opinion is the ultimate and most important one. Spend one entire week making every decision just for you, in a way that truly makes you happy. Don't think about whether it will make you look odd, or eccentric or selfish just do what works for you. As long as everyone that depends on you has their basic necessities you are allowed to put yourself and your needs first. Live your life for the entire week like no one is judging you or gets a say in the way you lead your life. After one week assess whether this makes you feel free and happier with your everyday life and choices. You get to be in charge of who you are, how you act and how you feel. Start living your life like no one is watching or judging and you will be able to bask in the real you, the one that you have created!

Change up your routine

Sometimes life can start to feel repetitive which tends to make us feel stagnant and like we are stuck in a rut. We have the ability though, to take our regular routine and shake it up a bit and this helps to renew our energy and good mood. Little changes in your day can lead to big changes in your life and it's up to you to find new outlets and experiences. These can be as small as taking a different route to work or stopping to eat breakfast out on your way there instead of eating at home. You may want to wear new accessories or change your hairstyle so that you start to feel a bit different about yourself. There are also several activities each weekend in most communities and you can find out about these in your local newspaper. Many are within a reasonable driving distance and even though you may not have thought of trying new activities, you will likely find yourself enjoying the break from your regular schedule and that will start to refresh your mood and attitude. You can go to a local fair, food tasting event, music concert or even blueberry picking, to create a little physical and mental vacation from your same old agenda. Just like an out of town vactation renews your spirit, trying new things can soothe your soul while you are at home. Everyone gets restless from time to time but get to know your community and find out what new restaurant or show is in your town and try it out with your family and friends. It's up to you to keep life interesting and whenever you feel stuck, jump online or grab a newspaper and find out what you can do in your own area to keep life exciting. Shake up your energy inside and out!

Are you in charge of your mood each day?

There are lots of factors in this world that constantly threaten to alter our good mood. Are you in control of your own mood and do you have the power to fight off negative influences and keep yourself in a happy place? I stopped watching the news many years ago because of the way that it affected me emotionally and I often wonder what would happen to the overall emotional status of socieity, if news programs and news papers only reported on the wonderful things that happen in the world each day. Even if half of the updates were about positive and uplifting events I think the tone of everyone would be lighter and more peaceful. Each of us has the power to decide whether we will let outside influences affect how we feel at any given moment. You can wake up every morning and decide that you will feel happy and positive and when a stumbling block presents itself before you, you get to decide how you are going to react to it. We all have choices, and challenging situations are perfect moments to start exercising these choices. If you wake up and feel a bit down there are several ways to lift yourself to a better place. Make a play list of songs that have inspiring and motivational lyrics and play them on your ride to work or while you sip your morning coffee. Music is a great way to get yourself in the mood to bask. If you spend a great day with family and friends, play music in the background so that the next time you are feeling a little down you can play the same music to mentally take yourself back to that same great day. You can actually reignite feelings that you had during an exciting moment by recreating a similar atmosphere. I always laugh when certain songs come on that I used to listen to in college because I instantly feel how I did when I was in my dorm room with friends. Stay in control of your mood and do whatever it takes to remain positive even when outside situations try to bring you down. Get yourself into the habit of getting out of bed each morning and making a choice to have a good day with a positive outlook. Don't let others take away the choices that you are lucky enough to have. Today is a good day, because you said so!

Are you a "Basker?"

Do you take the time to bask each day and revel in the wonderful life that you have created for yourself? Do you find little things each day that make you happy and take a moment to enjoy the goodness that you feel inside? Basking in your surroundings is such an important act but it is not necessarily natural for everyone. I think of it like the Choose Your Own Adventure books I used to read as a kid. You read half the book and then got to decide if you wanted to read story A or story B to continue to a particular ending. Basking is story A and not basking is story B. You will go through the same life so to speak but you can enjoy each moment so much more if you choose A and bask in all of the good things and try to look past as much of the bad as possible. One easy way to start basking is if you are in line at a store and the person checking you out is snarky or a customer service agent on the telephone makes you feel bad, instead of reacting and sharing in their unhappy moment you can pause for a breath and then make the decision to stay in a positive mindset. Tell yourself that he or she is probably having a bad day or a rough time at home. Most people don't treat others poorly just for the fun of it, it usually is because of a situation in their own life. Your continued kindness may even help to brighten the day of the negative person and that is a huge gift to give to someone else. We all have the choice to bask but if we don't make the official decision to do so, negative influences can slowly sneak up on us. Stop and look at yourself this week and figure out if you are taking time to bask in the wonderful aspects of your life. If you haven't been doing this, start little by little and find one great thing about yourself and your achievements, to revel in and celebrate. Enjoy your accomplishments and praise yourself for being you. The sooner you start the sooner you will excel at enjoying all the things that you have created for yourself in this wonderful life of yours. It is time to bask!

Adjust your technique and your attitude will follow

I learned a great lesson today and thought I should share it. The best part was learning it from my 3 year old son! He attends summer camp at the same place where he goes to preschool during the school year but for some reason he has a hard time transitioning at drop off time lately. He complains all morning before we leave, about not wanting to go to camp and then cries when it is time for me to leave. His counselors assure me that he always stops crying before I pull away and each day when I pick him up he is all smiles and tells me "I am happy", "I had a fun time". This of course makes me happy but does little to help me as I drive away each morning full of guilt for leaving my baby sad and crying. Today it was the same story, at first.. I decided on the car ride to make a little adjustment and started alking about a fun topic. By the time we got to camp we were going back and forth spouting out silly names that we would call our dog if we ever were to get one. He got out of the car laughing at "Popcorn and Shoelace" and all of the camp staff commented on how much they loved seeing his smile. When I left he was learning the real names of everyone's dog and laughing at the idea of calling one of them Jelly Bean. Such a minor adjustment made all the difference in the world. We were able to come up with an exciting alternative to our morning routine and I realized that all of us can do this whenever we dread an upcoming event or simply are not in the mood to tackle our agenda. We have the power to adjust our own mood by re-channeling our own thoughts and it's a wonderful thing to do when your attitude needs a little lift. The next time you are on your way to work or the grocery store or somewhere you aren't dying to get to, think of new ideas that make you happy and your experience will be much more enjoyable. We can learn from people of all ages and a great lesson was taught today! Smile and reorganize your thoughts to get to a place of happiness and joy.

Bask in your accomplishments as you achieve them

We are always working toward one goal or another and yes it is about the journey but it is also about the destination and once you reach your mission bask, bask, bask! The moment you achieve the goal you have been working toward, stop in your tracks and pat yourself on the back. Savor the support of those who have expressed it to you and praise yourself for a job well done. Once you reach the moment you have been waiting for, make sure to be fully in that special moment. You are in charge of all of your dreams and it is a true achievement to listen to yourself and go after those dreams instead of just wishing for them to come true someday. Celebrate your wonderful success and bask in it all the way. You deserve to be proud of yourself and all of your hard work!

*I want to say the most sincere thank you to everyone for their kind words regarding the release of my new book, Bask. The Dreamer's Guide to Reaching for the Stars While Realizing You Have Already Caught the Moon. I am so dearly touched by your support!*